Been meaning to get one of these things set up for a while, so here we go.
I am me. You can call me Sy. What is it short for? It isn’t rocket science! As I would be called Rs or something stupid like that. I am a male (so technically mentally a child and inept) and work in IT.
Lets catch up with life up to this date.
Male. Not old, not young. A thirtysomething. Married. Wonderful wife. I have a job.
That covers that!
So. Theft. The stealing waste of space idiot that stole my laptop and phone. Really…how can someone justify walking in to a house (while I was in it!) and taking my phone and my laptop. Who would do that? I will tell you who. The idiot that also stole a cheap bottle of vodka, an EMPTY(!) (yeah, what a waster!) bottle of JD…and left a litre of Johnny Walker Black label in a presentation box and a bottle of Blue Label. Really…you call yourself a burglar but take the cheap alcohol? Oh…and a bottle of sea water from South Africa. Man I hope they drank that one!!! “Yes officer…you are looking for a brainless thief….with a bad stomach!”. The laptop also has a short in the power cable. So with any luck I will read the local newspaper and see a man electrocuted himself on a laptop.
But that’s not the point. Where is life coming to when you have to lock your doors while in your own house?
So here is the question. If you could catch the person who did it…what would you say to them? Personally I would ask why they do it, but then…the brainless imbecile would just dribble over me as that’s the extent of the brain power he has. As a side note. You may notice I put “he”. It could have been a woman for all I know. But back to what I would do. Why is it you aren’t allowed to use a cattle prod against someone who has wronged you? How does that work? You can steal from a person and be the bad guy but the good guy cant give you a dose of electricity so hard you empty your bowels? It is just wrong! Or…am I wrong for wanting to give out pain to another human being? Does that also make me as bad as inept burglar dude?
Discuss. I would be happy to hear from the pro and against capital punishment peeps on this one. I have my views…which are I believe in it – under the right circumstances.
Now. Moving along from theft and staying with theft. British Gas. They HAVE to change there name. Take the British out of the name and replace it with “You have no” or “Wont fix your” or something like that. The boiler was deemed dangerous so they turn it off and say “We need to get a part”. 2 weeks later (it was a veeeery small round piece of plastic they needed) they still haven’t fixed it. Get a whole new piece! But it is OK. We only paid them £300 or so for the cover so I don’t expect anything anytime soon (where is that cattle prod?). Customer service in this country is going downhill rapidly. I finally got hold of someone at BG and explained my situation (situation is located at bottom of the blog and will be the subject of the next blog) and that they just need to get the whole bit and job done. 8 hours later….they are coming in 2 days time. 2 days? We have no hot water, heating, gas for the stove (the guy created a gas leak when he turned the boiler off. Way to go fella. Awesome job.) and a house which is…well…freakin freezing!
So who is the bad guy in this little tale of betrayal? Cast your votes now:
– inept burglar dude who “had a hard childhood” zzzzzzzzap. Take that you fiend!
– BG who cant fix a small plastic thing inside of 2 weeks leaving a cold house
– Me (!) for expecting something more from being in this world. Like customer service or people who don’t steal from me
If you are still here…leave a message. Just so I know someone even reads this. Leave a blank message, or be rude…I don’t mind. At least you made the effort!
Coming soon to this blog:
Just found out I am going to be a father (for the first time).
Thanks for reading. This could be the start of a beautiful friendship.
Sy
wheelturninghamsterdead.com 