How many people have heard those lines. OK, so you might be female, so it might be “young
lady” instead of “young man”, but you get the gist. Don’t make it difficult for difficults sake!
I have finally found the two statements will indeed come true. I bought “Edible Scrabble” which is “Made from Real Belgium chocolate!” as the box excitedly tells me. Am I to assume that the statement is to tell me that the chocolate is the best you will get? Because frankly, “Real Cadbury chocolate” will taste like a pair of my sweaty socks were they to not make it properly, so surely the Belgium’s make the same mistake in the Chocolatiering process once in a while?! I am sure I will find out when I pick up the letters “s, r, d, w, o” and cant make a word with it, thus I will just eat the letters instead.
Then you have the following problem. Who do you play chocolate scrabble with? It is going to need to be a carefully selected few. Lets look at the possible participants:
There is the bad loser. You cant pick someone with a history of going off on one as they lost the game as they will get annoyed, pick up enough letters to write “Jigglybits” (coz I am sure that would be a good score) and scoff them down in one go. Game over.
Then there is the chocolate fan who “will just have one more as they are so nice!”. Their score will be in minus figures and will eat the letter “Z” as hey…what words have that in it! (does the German version of scrabble have more then 1 Z in it?)
I will pause this here for a second and mention an observation. I am on the PC but in front of me is Sky News. There is a bloke with blonde shaved hair at the side, then a green mohican and the top part is red and goes in to a pony tail. WHY!!!! I would say he looks stupid, and I will…but only because this blog is a Rated Universal. But you know what I REALLY want to say!
Aaaaaaanyway. Back to the chocolate munching participants.
You then have the intelligent one. They wipe you out by scoring 300 points more then you do. This can have 1 of 2 effects. “Screw this…I am eating the letters! or “I am now not even hungry after that humiliation”.
There is the other issue of whose letters do you eat? As a friend told me: “I will lick them all before I put them on the board”. This may be the most unsanitary game I will ever play!
There is no easy way of saying “I might just play with myself then” as there are so many connotations when someone reads that. What I indeed mean is that I will play scrabble on my own. Or with my wife who is starting to need chocolate fixes since she fell pregnant. Depending on pregnant mood swings at time of playing, she could be all of the above! She is generally the one that humiliates me though…
So another year has started. I guess that means about the same as this time last year. Nothing. Nada. Nout. I do have just one resolution this year. I have decided that I will just make broken promises to myself all year and that way I don’t have to feel bad about messing anything up by mid January! I cant fail this one!
This Christmas was also a landmark. It was the last Christmas and New Year as a family of 2 in my house. Next year there will be a small 5 month old mini me demanding our time. It will then be the same for many years to come. I can imagine a lot of people would see this as a daunting time. Frankly, I can’t wait! I live with who I regard as my soul mate, and only good things will come from a little us bounding about the house breaking stuff! Wont it?!
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