Category Archives: General Madness

I am thinking of changing the name of the site to “The wheel may be turning, but someone stuck something foreign in their body”.  Or something like that.   I hadn’t really given much thought to it.  But it just seems that most of the recent posts have been regarding people inserting foreign objects in toContinue reading “Excuse me sir…is that a fish swimming up your penis?”

I like Australians.  I mean it.  Yeah, OK…I hate them for their sporting abilities and how they hurt my good old English boys every chance they can, but apart from that, I always thought they were good people. Until today when my feelings changed. They changed when I decided that they are freaking awesome. InContinue reading “Alcohol makes sure the tick goes in the right direction.”

Hellooooo there.  Welcome to 2009.  I am happy to note that I will be writing this post with a clear mind and good health (or a 4 alarm hangover and my liver is just about dead if you want the truth.) So what is the obvious post to write then?  New years resolutions obviously.  AlthoughContinue reading “New year….no change.”

Are you from Illinois?  Or maybe from a different state but can answer this one simple question for me? The question?  Well, it is simple.  It is: “What the hell is this all about!?” Now, that wont make any sense until you watch the video below.  I am quite lost for words.  Actually, no thatContinue reading “Heeeeeere piggy piggy piggy.”

Wow.  I have completed a huge FIVE posts this month.  Craziness.  I need to slow down before you are all overloaded with amusing posts.  *cough*  So on with number six.  Calm yourselves! Not sure where this post will take me.  I have no plans at all for it, but I have some time between changingContinue reading “Ummm…soooo…errr…. Hi. How are you?”

Geez, you know this site has really gone downhill lately.  I haven’t had a single spam comment for a week now.  In the old days, I would get a good 20-30 a day.  Now?  Nothing.  I think that is telling me something.  That something is very very wrong.  When the spammer’s can’t even be botheredContinue reading “I wonder what that is? I think I will bite it and see.”

I feel bad writing this post.  I have friends who are vegetarians.  And I have no problem with vegetarians (well…).  I just enjoy having a go at vegetarians.  Thus: Are you a vegetarian?  Do you actually remember if you are a vegetarian?  Have you committed mass lettuce murder?  The chances are that you don’t remember. Continue reading “Being a vegetarian is bad for your memory. FACT.”

This post is best read while imagining beaker from The Muppets is talking.  Well, meeping.  Thinking about it, the following clip is more like what I hear and see when I think about the following people!   In the last 45 minutes, all I have heard is people moaning.  The thing is, all I am watching isContinue reading “Where did I put my noose? (time for a whinge)”

*ring ring*  Phone displays “Wifey Calling”.  Actually, I started off with a blatant lie.  My phone doesn’t go ring ring.  It plays a song called On March the Saints by a band called DOWN.  You should go listen to the track, and report back to me telling me how awesome I am for introducing thatContinue reading “Full circle and back to the start.”

Things I have found out from recent Antenatal classes, when me, a man (honest!) got to sit in a room full of hormonal women, and got really scared. After the birth, whenever my wife sits down, do not talk to her about anything she needs to know for at least 3 minutes, as it isContinue reading “At least pull a face when you clench…”