Category Archives: General Madness

A couple of weeks ago, I got told I was incredibly and unbelievablya little grumpy and should really live in a cave.  This was said by a man wearing a pair of running tights that were so tight that it looked like they had been painted on to his legs…which were tied together.  I meanContinue reading “Look. Stop moaning and get back in your cave Sy.”

I have noticed that a lot of people that read this site use mobile phones.  iPhones, Android phones and even an Etch-a-Sketch.  I figured I should probably make things easier for those reading it by using a template that is smartphone friendly.  So if you are reading this on something more mobile than a tightContinue reading “I would make the change, but I am too busy stretching my cat.”

It’s been a while since I abused a news story.  Too many posts have been a little too “Me”centric recently.  Good news! In what can only be classed as first class journalism and not wasting the time of anyone’s day in reporting something so utterly pointless that you would be better off pulling your toenailsContinue reading “Yes I am sure it is impressive, but honestly…I think you’re an idiot.”

I have a problem.  Well, OK that opens us up to a friggin huge list of possible things ranging from being that I am as ugly as…erm…you…right through to the fact I am fairly confident that my ankles are shrinking.  No really, they are.  I noticed the other day.  There I stood in front ofContinue reading “That, my friend, is not a bouffant…it’s a slap in the face.”

I have a nemesis.  A cucumber to my sandwich so to speak.  Ah come on.  The stuff is bloody evil.  It is green to start with, and everyone who likes it says “But it doesn’t taste of anything!”  Well why the hell are you eating it then?  If a cardboard box didnt taste of cardboard,Continue reading “Ever seen an embryo run a marathon? Coming April 2011….”

A few weeks ago I lined up at the start of a 10K race.  A distance I have done many times.  Hell, it’s only 6.22 miles.  I have ran a marathon, so this race  Was just a quick out and back, smile at the waving children, be loved by the ladies and have the otherContinue reading “Ambulances. Like going in a Ferrari but you get to lay down.”

I changed jobs recently. Off to greener thingies and joined those crazy fools who commute. It’s fun. For now. Sure, come crazy middle winter time when I am standing on the train platform covered in rain or snow playing the “where the hell did my testicles go…are  they now hiding in my moobs which isContinue reading “The problem with commuting is the commuters. They’re friggin insane.”

Well.  It went and happened.  Daughter number 2 bounced (not literally…the hospitals here are quite awesome) in to the world on Monday morning. Yup, the young lady decided to wait until I had just finished a load of night shifts, had very little sleep and then made me stay up for 30+ hours.  Thanks kiddo.  But Braelyn’sContinue reading “Childbirth. It’s like squeezing a can of beer through a mouse. Only not.”

Look, I know I haven’t written on here for a while.  I have been busy.  Doing stuff.  And after doing a lot of this stuff, I have realised that I seriously need to man up.  Yes I know you have known this for a while.  No need to be pedantic now is there. It just took meContinue reading “I’m not a complete idiot…parts of me are missing.”

Yeah I know what you are thinking.  You are thinking “Ohh…the simpleton has put up a post an entire month since the last one!  It is going to be special!”.  Well…. There are a lot of things I hate.  Disappointing people is one of them. I also hate the fact that after many years ofContinue reading “…but I also like a lot of stuff. Like kittens and puppies and beer.”